PeTA has gone bonkers – see article HERE.
Recently, Sam obtained a “friend” named Sally at the Notso Dumb Friend’s League. Sally, a healthy and lively Cocker Spaniel, was Sam’s best friend. They went everywhere together, and they even slept in the same bed. They were inseparable! Over time, Sally seemed unhappy, and was losing weight; her appetite was not good. Sam provided only the best quality organic food; spinach, broccoli, carrots etc. Sam, being a PeTA member and therefore not a consumer of meat (doesn’t eat animals), was a vegetarian, and Sally had to be one too. Sam, a very organic health conscious no processed food person, provided Sally with only the highest quality organic vegetables. Sally would pick at her food, but did not attack it with zeal. Sally, in the six months that she and Sam had started living together, had dropped over 20 pounds since Sam brought her home from the Dumb Friend’s League and was now looking very emaciated, and Sam became extremely concerned for Sally’s well being as she became more and more lethargic. Sam even took her to the Veterinarian to see what to do, and Sam rejected as out of hand the Vet’s encouragement that Sally eat meat.
It wasn’t until Sam met Sergeant, a German Shepherd, that he began to see what was needed. After consulting with Sally, Sergeant told Sam that dogs eat meat – “They are carnivores and need lots of protein!” said Sergeant with such absolute authority that Sam sat up and took intense notice of his declaration. Sam went stealthily by night to Whole Foods where, while wearing a hoodie to conceal his face from any potential friends who might be there and see him, he bought a pound of hamburger quite reluctantly, and then hurried home grievously concerned for Sally. Sam rushed into the bedroom where Sally had been laying semi-comatose for two days, and while wearing gloves, pinched off a piece of hamburger raw from the package. Sally initially seemed unmoved.
Sam ran the piece of hamburger under her nose, and Sally’s nose twitched. Then he did it again, and not only did her nose twitch, but her eyes opened wide – she scarfed up that piece of hamburger in the wink of an eye! Sam gave her another piece which she practically inhaled. Within an hour, Sally had finished the pound of hamburger and was licking Sam and thanking him profusely for the meat. Sam continued to feed Sally meat, and within a couple of days Sally was playful and gaining weight. Within a week, she had gained 5 pounds and was full of energy.
Sally talked Sam into taking her to the dog park for a walk. At the dog park, the two of them ran into Sergeant. Sergeant said to Sam, “Is this your friend Sally?” Sam said; “Yes!” Sergeant said, “How do you do?” Sally fell in love with Sergeant immediately because Sam had already told her of Sergeant’s wisdom and concern for Sally. From then on, the three of them were inseparable.
Moral of the Story? :
Two may be company, but it may take a third to correct an idiot!
Now, Sam has a bumper sticker on his car that reads “I love animals – they taste great!”
All of Sam’s PeTA friends have abandoned him!
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